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April Links Post

Things my friends have done:

  • The lovely Holly Y has also participated in National Poetry Month, with a good deal more flair and humour than I.

Things I have done:

Things strangers have done:

  • Written a rather funny article about how to write the Great American Novel. I’d write the Great British Novel but a) I’m not very good and b) it’s already been written.
  • Reproduced Rudyard Kipling’s advice on living in London, all of which is entirely pertinent in every possible way, especially the bit about not rolling in the grass in the parks.
  • In 1935, Sigmund Freud managed to display a more enlightened attitude toward homosexuality than an depressingly large number of modern politicians, as evidenced in this letter.
  • Captured beautiful photos of London’s landmarks and landscapes … in reflections in street puddles.
  • Natasha Hodgson has reviewed Battleship, thus removing any need to see it, and also making me do a small laughter-wee.
  • Speculated on Why Americans Hate the Media.

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National Poetry Month: Day 28

insomniac’s prayer

something stirring in the shadows beneath the bed
with a bagful of pins in your swallowing throat
a loaded gun pressed like a palm to your head
each breath is an enemy soldier’s joke
as the sun flees and leaves you for dead.

night comes down with a killing blow
unstoppering thought with cruelty
until the mind’s killing fields glow
with blood and endless impiety
as the sun flees and dark grows.

when the last light’s gone
and your mind is wide,
evil suspicions won
rampaging inside:
thus fled the sun.

– Delilah Des Anges


Other poems to read today:

Sleep in the Mojave Desert, Sylvia Plath

The Man With Night SweatsThom Gunn

Slumber-SongSiegfried Sassoon

To His Mistress Going To Bed, John Donne


Throughout this month I will be nagging readers to donate to MSF

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National Poetry Month: Day 2

Metamorphosis: The Womb Years

When the interlocking lumps of proteins
too small for the eye to ever see
meet to form hydrocarbon chains, it seems

one has the basis of you, and me;
the signals sent inform a mass
of undifferentiated matter what to be

and over months there comes to pass
the first tentative shapes of  mankind.
From the start they’re lad or lass

but later some will come to find
that whatever genes have suggested
the body does not match the mind

and rather than live life arrested
in a body that just will not do
the original form is divested.


One factor which many people find off-putting about reading poetry for pleasure is that for many of us (including me) our first exposure to poetry is at school, complete with growling insistence that we’re reading it wrong, that we need to be examining it for this or that theme, and being told what to find beautiful or indeed how to feel about it all.

I fortunately escaped the latter part of that and, leaving aside the soothing lullaby of A A Milne that I barely remember from my pre-school days, my introduction to the world of poetry involved a teaching more or less pranging a volume of Allan Ahlberg‘s glorious, mischievous school-based poems (most likely Heard It In The Playground)  at me and shouting “please read this and be quiet“. And it was by this method that I discovered that poetry, rather than being an awful bore that is inflicted upon one in long passages of countryside, death, maidens, or righteous unrhyming needling of a vague and nebulous The Government, can also be good fun.

A short list: A A Milne dealing in utter absurdities as well as moments of quiet contemplation, Edward Lear, Adrian Mitchell, Roger McGough, Spike Milligan, and the incomparable and utterly opposed to A A Milne Dorothy Parker.

There is also Kit Wright, who came back to my attention recently while leafing through my copy of Staying Alive in order to find more poets to overzealously suggest to a stranger online who made tentative noises about wanting to maybe read more poetry. The poem which caught my attention was a zingy, vituperative satirical verse, but for the sake of this post I am going to link to another of his poems from the same book:

The All Purpose Country and Western Self Pity Song, by Kit Wright.

Please, please, please read this out loud. It trips off the tongue. It tugs you along with the relentless rhythm of a train. It almost commands a tune for itself in its own cadences. It is a marvellous, masterful example of how a choppy rhythm and a rhyme scheme which ricochets with concealed carefulness can drive a poem and make it a positive joy to recite.

He jumped off the box-car
In Eastbourne, the beast born
In him was too hungry to hide;
His neck in grief’s grommet,
He groaned through his vomit
At the churn
And the yearn
At the turn of the tide.
Try it. Just try it.

Throughout this month I will be nagging readers to donate to MSF.

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March Links Post

Things my friends have done

  • My friend Liza, recording under the name “Lizzie Borden”, has covered “Folkin’ Around” by Panic at the Disco, with her trusty ukulele.
  • A friend of a friend, B. L. Becotte, was taking commissions recently and has a brilliant, Bisette-reminiscent style, so I splashed out on having a scene from As Simple As Hunger illustrated.

Things I have done

Things strangers have done

  • Written about the sex diaries of respected economist and apparent bisexualist John Maynard Keynes.
  • Made a theremin out of a dead badger. Why, you may ask. Because it’s cool.
  • “Proven” (according to my sister) that “all rich people are bastards”. Or at least, are prone to cheating.
  • Created, played, and recorded a piece on violin strings made of spider silk.
  • Written about royal same-sex marriage … in 17th-Century England.
  • Discovered that bees have personalities! Some are apparently thrill-seeking, neophile bees, and others are cautious bees that like to stick to what they know best. I’m sure most apiarists would have said this before.
  • Come forth with another theory for what causes autism. I have an autistic spectrum disorder myself, and I can’t say I’m thrilled by the idea of “cures”. It does sort of suggest absolving society of having to be a little more tolerant of people who are different.
  • Provided a lot of X-rays of various families, genii, and species of fish. I love anatomy.
  • Written an eloquent and wide-ranging essay linking various protest movements around London, the grime scene, and a work of art created by a deranged Victorian arsonist. I often have mixed feelings about China Mieville’s work: while I broadly agree with his politics and find his stories fascinating sometimes I take issue with his use of language and I eternally find his eagerness to marry dance music and political protest somewhat embarrassing. However as with anyone the way to my heart is through an unyielding affection for London in all her dirty, broken, ever-changing glories, and China is never, ever short on that. Well worth reading.
  • Investigated giant squid and colossal squid eyes. It seems that their vast eyes might help them to spot evidence of sperm whales coming to eat them.
  • Flattered everyone who writes by suggesting that writing is really hard and requires loads of brainpower. I’m sure for good writers it’s something that requires a lot of delicate footwork but certainly not the way I do it!
  • Written about Casanova, who was more of an intellectual than his playboy depiction in popular culture would lead you to believe.

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February Links Post

Things my friends have done

Things I have done

Things strangers have done

  • Begun the process of reconstructing sounds from brainwaves, apparently. I cannot work out if this is cool, terrifying, or both.
  • Compiled a gorgeous selection of photographs of the most beautiful and innovative bookshops in the world. I am sad about the lack of representation of Hay-on-Wye, but deeply envious of some of the ones that are on the list. Portugal especially have apparently nailed “awesome bookshop”.
  • Interesting fellow on OKCupid showed me his music (this is not a euphemism), so naturally I am going to share it with the internet: Add Gray Fun. The two tracks I’ve listened to are sort of sparse and build tunes out of discord, which I’m very fond of as a feature in electronica. Professionally speaking I think they definitely need mixing & mastering – some work on the levels – and would personally have an annoying faff with reverb in places but overall I rather like it.
  • This fuzzy-haired scientist has an apparently supportable theory that cats make us bonkers. When you add up all the different ways it can harm us, says Flegr, “Toxoplasma might even kill as many people as malaria, or at least a million people a year.” Well, that’s not terrifying at all.
  • This Tumblr user is using police photo-fit software to try to recreate the faces of famous literary characters as described by their authors. What a fantastic concept!
  • Josie Long takes on UniLadMag and does so wonderfully.
  • When Same-Sex Marriage Was a Christian Rite. Fascinating to me, and I do have a copy of a book with a title along the lines of “Same Sex Unions in Medieval Europe” waiting for me to finish reading the thousands of other books I’ve acquired and get around to it.
  • Written about The Invention of Heterosexuality, which examines how other areas of social change during the birth of psychiatry as a profession led to the creation of sexual identities connected to biological urges, and the value judgements that come with them.
  • People Like Me, a very depressing list of unfair treatment you can expect to receive if you’re viewed as being “unacceptably” fat.
  • A handy little interactive graph for women to use to determine which clothing size their measurements make them at any given clothing shop.
  • An Eight-Step Guide To Self-Editing Your Manuscript. On, completely unrelated, a very pretty blog.
  • Via that link, a useful website for determining how often you use particular words. I am cringing just imagining what would come up on mine.
  • And an io9 article about what the problem is with adverbs
  • As a confirmed over-emotional weenie about the city I live in who buys maps and cries every time she lands back at Heathrow and owns an embarrassing number of books of London photography, this post about London set to music is rather moving.
  • This fascinating blog over at Tiger Beatdown about how reality television and blogging have destroyed the ability of readers and viewers to appreciate the difference between performance and reality.
  • A very funny review of what sounds like a very awful movie (Splice).
  • In a rather timely coincidence, not long after I whined that I’d be more inclined to eat healthily if healthy food were more convenient, a friend of mine discovered COOK, who have made that leap for me.

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Guest Posts Elsewhere!

Just a note to let anyone following this blog know, today my guest post at Madame Guillotine has been put up: Irene Adler & The Case of the Sudden Femme Fatale.

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Links post: December/January

Things My Friends Do

Things I’ve Done

  • … I’ll get back to you on that.

Things Strangers Have Done

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